“How to overcome Bitterness”

Bitterness is like terminal cancer in a marriage relationship.  If left undealt with, bitterness will eat away at every area of a couples’ relationship. 

Questions to ponder: 

• How can I prevent bitterness in my marriage? 
• How do I recognize bitterness in my marriage?
• How do I overcome bitterness in my marriage?

I was working with a married couple years ago and you could tell things were rough as they entered because of where they sat in my office.  One sat at one end of the couch and the other sat at the other end.  Both had their eyes fixed on me and would not look at each other.  I thought to myself, “hum, these two must have had a quiet ride while on their way here today.”

To make a long story much shorter, three to four weeks into sessions with them saw a very different seating arrangement as they began sitting closer and closer to each other. By week four they reminded me of a newlywed couple. You know, all tangled up and making ga-ga eyes at each other. 

What made the big difference in their relationship between weeks one and four?  Simply put, they worked to overcome bitterness between them. 

It reminds me of the Old Testament story of when the Israelite Priests were carrying the Ark of the Covenant and the Hebrew children needed to cross over the Jordan River, but it was harvest time and the Jordan river had overflowed its banks.  God told the Priests to step into the swollen Jordan and it would part for them so that they could cross over.  The Priests had to think about the stories they had heard growing up of the Red Sea crossing when Pharoah and his army were chasing God’s people.  Moses just raised his staff and the Red Sea parted for them to cross.  But this time, forty years later, God says to the Priests, “step into the Jordan” and I will part it so that My people can cross. Sometimes God just does things for us, but other times He requires us to take a step of faith for Him to do something amazing for us.  To overcome bitterness, choose forgiveness and watch how God works!  Choosing forgiveness requires more than a one time choice.  Sometimes it’s a minute-by-minute choice.  Choosing forgiveness is not easy, but it is worth it!  When forgiveness is chosen in marriage, both partners must work together.  This is where seeking support from a biblical counselor can help.  Call today and start your journey to freedom from bitterness.